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Subject: Protest Report - Washington DC, March, 1998
From: rkeller@netaxs.com (Rod Keller)
Date: 30 Jun 1999 18:23:25 GMT
Message-ID: <7ldnat$hhd@netaxs.com>

Yes, the subject line is correct. 1998. I posted a report back then, but
here now is the rest of the story.

We were all set to protest the FCDC, Arnie, myself, Joe Harrington,
BigBeard, dst, I forget the whole list right now. It was a nice crowd. We
were preparing signs at Arnie's house. Victoria was taping this acid house
music for her to jog to. Monotonous beat, minimalist stuff. She had to
leave, and we got finished with the construction process. We took a pickup
truck to the Metro, and got into the District very quickly. 

We had a good day outside, talked to lots of OSA, took lots of pictures. 
I noticed this woman in red sequined tights wheeling a big speaker past. I
did a double-take. She had black fishnet stockings, a sequined headpiece
and choker, and a big red plume sticking up about two feet. Her make-up
was very thick, with eyelashes as long as your fingers. Her nails were
done in bright pink. A full Vegas-style chorus girl outfit. Arnie's face
was like stone. It was Victoria. She set up shop on the triangle across
from the org and started a tape, acid house monotonous beat music, and
started reciting poetry in time with the music using a microphone and her
speaker set-up. "Scientology is a scam, it is a crime", something like
that. 

Arnie hisses at me through his teeth, "I had no idea. I had no idea". 
We're all stunned. Even Sylvia Stanard, who asked me if it's a man or a
woman. To me, this is a damn stupid question. Victoria has what I would
consider unambiguous curves. She later told me the choker is used by drag
queens to hide the adam's apple. 

Vic had a handful of shocking pink flyers "Scientology hates gays" with a
triangle and the universal circle/slash symbol. Everybody was taking a
flyer from the drag queen/chorus girl. It's a very gay neighborhood, with
about three gay bars and a bookstore withing two blocks. You could see the
bright pink up and down the street in everybody's hands. 

Thierry Duchaunac took lots of pictures of Vic, and eventually a cop came
over. She was told that the piece of sidewalk she's on is actually
property of the restaurant on the corner. She had to move, and a passer-by
volunteered to help her. She stayed for quite a while, handing out flyers,
attracted lots of attention. Arnie stayed shocked, he couldn't believe it. 
I was shocked, none of us had anything to say. Arnie pulled the cops aside
at one point to ask them to please be cool with his girlfriend.  There
were no problems.

Time to leave, time for dinner. We went to this little place we always go,
and had blue cheese burgers and a pitcher of the beverage of our choice. 
Vic came with us, and caused a stir in the restaurant. She told us to let
everybody know her name is "Miss Mary Happy Ass", which is apparently a
term of endearment for some gay couples. As in "Well aren't you a flirt,
Miss Mary Happy Ass!" We agreed. 

Time for the Metro. We had to change trains at one of the big
interchanges, and Vic of course attracted attention. She started handing
out flyers, and started telling folks about the evils of Scientology. She
went on for about 10 minutes until our train came. We had maybe 30 people
crowded around, and they loved her.

It was a warm day, but by the time we were ready to get back in the pickup
it was evening, and very cool. Vic was all set to get in the back with me,
but she was shivering in that little outfit. I told her she'd freeze her
happy ass off if she sat on the metal truck bed, so I offered to have her
sit on my lap. She did, and I kept her warm on the ride back. I think
that's the Victoria I'll remember, covered in sequins, feather plume
tickling my nose, shivering and huddled against me to stay warm. No
raunchy jokes, please, it was just necessary.

It took her a good 45 minutes to get out of all the get-up and makeup, and
she put on this bright green sweatshirt. It went smashingly with her
still-pink fingernails. And now you know the full story of Miss Mary Happy
Ass. She did a lot of good that day, and I hope she gets well soon.

-- 
Rod Keller / rkeller@voicenet.com / Irresponsible Publisher
Black Hat #1 / Expert of the Toilet / CWPD Mouthpiece
The Lerma Apologist / Merchant of Chaos / Vision of Destruction
Killer Rod / OSA Patsy / Quasi-Scieno / Mental Bully